I am one in a million.

TM Application - What are the five steps to a successful negotiation?

Wed, 03 Sep 2008 10:42:34 GMT

The first step in a successful negotiation is the easiest: know what you want. Ask yourself, "what is it I really want from this person or situation?" It's the easiest, but that doesn't mean it's not hard sometimes just knowing what it is you want or hope to accomplish. You may think you want one thing and then find out that it was about something totally different all along. Which isn't necessarily bad or anything, it just might mean you walk away from the table with the thing you only thought you wanted and not the thing that you later found out was what you really wanted. So before you even bother trying to get something, make sure it's the thing you really want.

Step two is to decide how much it's worth and then how much more you're willing to pay for it or in other cases, how much less you're willing to accept for it. Everyone has their price, but you're not always going to get it. That's a given. So instead of just this single price, you have to come up with a range. If someone makes you an offer that falls within said range, then great. You've got a deal. If they fail to meet even your lowest of expectations, then walk away already. Sometimes the walking away part is what makes them eventually decide to make you the kind of offer you can't refuse.

Three is to make your offer. You know what you want, you know what your limits are as far as the negotiating process goes. Now it's time to make a play for it. Sometimes this step is also known as getting an offer. It's the same thing really, it's just less legwork for you because they're doing the asking. The offer stage is really a crucial one. It can determine if you walk away from the table right then and there, either because you got what you wanted or because you know for a fact you're not going to. Which means that step four may or may not apply.

Step four is to make a counter-offer if necessary. Common practice is to low-ball it, because you can always go higher but the same isn't quite true in reverse. You can't exactly start offering someone less than what you've already offered. Usually at this point, things go back and forth a little while and most of the time in any serious negotiation, the parties settle right around this stage. But if not...

Five: Fight like Hell. Let's face it, sometimes you've gotta get your hands a little dirty. Sometimes it's not enough to have a solid plan and to stick by it. I may not be the most business minded person in the world, but even I know how to play the game. So if Victoria thinks for one second that she's really going to take my company from me, she is sadly mistaken. Because this isn't even a negotiation anymore.

It's war.

Brooke Davis
One Tree Hill
497 Words

FM May Topic - If you could change one thing in your past what would it be?

Sat, 26 Apr 2008 09:25:15 GMT

Nothing.

I know I probably shouldn’t even be answering this question since it seems hinge on what you would change rather than the fact that you wouldn’t change anything at all, but hear me out. See, it used to be that I really wanted to change who I was up until about my sophomore/junior in high school. I was unapologetically a party girl. I don’t deny it and I never would. It’s who I was. But then all these other amazing things started to happen, and I just really wanted to be the kind of girl who deserved those things. I wanted to work to earn them. I wanted to have them, knowing that they really belonged to me and weren’t just some fluke of the universe where a couple of good things happened to land in my lap.

As it turned out, people were way more appreciative of the person I became knowing the person I had been. It makes for great evolution. No matter who you are, personal development is so crucial. And I think anyone who doesn’t change that much from the time they’re twelve until the time they’re twenty-two really hasn’t been that honest to the process. ‘Cause in ten years, you should be a totally different person. It means something, to grow. It sucks and it’s all too painful most of the time but it’s worth it to one day be a better version of yourself knowing it completely could’ve gone the other way.

Maybe I should want to change it. After the little stunt that Victoria pulled when I was trying to adopt, maybe I should really want to erase the record of all my mistakes, all the things I was that I never should have been. But the thing that I know that my mother doesn’t is that those things, the ones she tried to use against me, are all the perfect examples of why I do deserve to be a mother myself.

It’s proof positive that I’m going to be a million times the mother that she never was and I wouldn’t change anything that proves that.

FM April Topic - Is not a kiss the very autograph of love? -Henry Finck

Sat, 26 Apr 2008 09:21:24 GMT

I’m just gonna go on record here with a little thing I informed Lucas of a long time ago. It’s a relatively simple concept, but you’d be surprised at just how many times people get it mixed up or confused. Or worse yet, they just don’t get it all.

A kiss always means something.

Don’t ever say; ‘oh, it was just a kiss, it didn’t mean anything!’ because you’re a liar and you know that it did. I mean, unless you’re playing Spin-the-Bottle in which case you’re at the mercy of velocity pretty much and then that doesn’t count. But every other kiss? Each one planned or unplanned, accidental or purposeful, heartfelt or hateful – it all means something. There’s always a reason, and like it or not, that reason is always somehow tied to a feeling. It’s okay. We’re only human.

Lucas had a good alibi, I’ll tell you that. Peyton kissed him the day of the school shooting as she was bleeding out from a gunshot wound to her leg in the library. Now, I know what you may be saying here. You may be thinking; ’but, Brooke, maybe they thought she was dying! it was a good-bye kiss.’ First of all, do we even know each other? Second of all, that may have been true if it hadn’t been their long history together and a previous history of betraying me. Also, the idea that it was just some tragic good-bye kiss is lame. We’re not living on the set of a movie. We’re talking about real people, with real feelings. And real people are responsible for their actions.

Anyway, I’d have been right regardless. Feelings – mutual feelings – were later revealed that had been there all along. And no matter what either of them tried to tell me about that kiss, it was irrelevant.

The kiss was evidence of something I should have known all along.

TM 226 - Name three things that you're looking forward to in the near future and why.

Tue, 15 Apr 2008 06:12:52 GMT

1. The very first thing I am looking forward to is Caleb graduating from Harvard and us finally moving in together. Long distance relationships suck. They do. And if there hadn't been an end in sight for this one, if I hadn't known all along that our roads would one day merge, I don't know if I would have been able to do this. It's been so hard only getting to see him once or twice a month, and it's even harder every time I have to say good-bye. I miss him. And I can't wait for him to be a part of my every day life and vice versa. Don't get me wrong, playing house with Peyton is great and all. But I'm ready for the real thing. I want the real thing, and I want it with him. I'm a lucky girl. 'Cause he wants it with me too.

2. This one might be kinda scary for Caleb, but I'm looking forward to being a mother. I don't know how near or far into the future that is, but it is there. I've known for awhile now that this was maybe the thing I wanted to do most. And I know that people are gonna think that this is misguided. I have everything I could ever possibly want. More money than I could ever spend in this lifetime, two beautiful homes, cars, my own company with a clothing line, a magazine, and actual boutiques. And don't get me wrong, it's great. It is everything I could have ever dreamed of and then some. But it's not as fulfilling as I'd thought it would be. I want a family. I want the family I never had. And I know everyone says that, but maybe it just means that there's something we're all missing. Maybe having a child won't fill the empty space in me that leaves me so hollow, even with having everything. But I want to be the mother I never had to a child who has a mother like I did. People have always told me I was going to change the world. I think this is the way that was meant to happen.

3. The last thing I'm looking forward to is for my best friend Peyton to be happy again. This whole thing with Lucas and the wedding that never was but he still said he did, and her time in L.A. and the reality of what the recording industry really is, it's all got her really down. And Peyton Sawyer is too good to be down. Something good is bound to happen to her. It has to. She deserves it so much, and so right now, most of all, I am looking forward to life being half as good to my best friend as it's been to me.

Brooke Davis
One Tree Hill
472 Words

Couples meme thing, taken from almost everyone

Tue, 01 Apr 2008 05:53:17 GMT

Featuring me & caleb_danvers.

1. Who eats more?
He'll probably argue and say he does, but it's definitely me. What can I say? I'm a designer, not a model.

2. Who said "I love you" first?
Him, I think. No wait, it was me. It was sort of accidental. He said something really sweet and sort of unexpected and I just sort of blurted it out. I meant it though, and so did he when he said it back.

3. How long have you been together?
About eight months. We met on July 4th and it was pretty much instant.

4. Who sings better?
Him. I really can't sing.

5. Who's older?
Caleb, by a few months.

6. Who's smarter?
Definitely him. Hello, Harvard Boy!

7. Whose temper is worse?
Mine. He's actually pretty level and calm. He calms me down.

8. Who does the laundry?
We both do, 'cause we live separately right now. When we move in together though, I'll probably end up doing it. I'm a stickler for proper laundering. Designers don't work as hard as they do just so you can ruin your clothes by ignoring color groups and water temps.

9. Who does the dishes?
See above, except switch me with him when it comes to who will be doing it.

10. Who sleeps on the right side of the bed?
Me.

11. Who snores?
Neither of us, I don't think.

12. Whose hair is longer?
Mine.

13. Who's better with the computer?
He is. Like I said, smart boy.

14. Do you have pets?
No, but I totally think we should get a puppy someday when we live together. Maybe one of those little teacup breeds. But not so much for purposes of accessorizing. Mostly because the bigger the dog, the bigger the mess.

15. Who pays the bills?
We both pay our own bills.

16. Who cooks dinner?
We don't really eat in so much. But the few times we have, he cooked. I'd like to plead the Carrie Bradshaw: "The only thing I've ever made in the kitchen is a mess. And several small fires."

17. Who drives when you are together?
Caleb.

18. Who pays when you go out to dinner?
He does usually. Though I pay when he lets me. It's not like I can't afford it or anything. He's just very old fashioned and traditional.

19. Who is the most stubborn?
Okay, that would definitely be me. Like I said, he's very zen.

20. Who is the first one to admit when they're wrong?
Him. See #19.

21. Whose parents do you see more?
His. My dad doesn't even know I exist anymore, and I'm not going to subject Caleb to Victoria considering I actually want him to stick around. But we see his mom pretty much every time we're in Ipswich. It's not often, but it's enough.

22. Who named your kids?
We don't have any. Yet.

23. Who kissed who first?
He kissed me first, at my rooftop Fourth of July party.

24. Who asked who out?
I invited him back to my party after he totally saved my ass from this renegade cab.

25. Who dusts the house?
We dust our own houses, I guess. Or sometimes I make Peyton dust mine.

26. Who's more sensitive?
Probably me. Though he's not exactly lacking in that department. Or any department, really.

27. Who cleans the bathroom?
The cleaning lady. Who also cleans all the other things mentioned except the other answers were more fun.

28. Who has more friends?
Me, but not by much. He just has three friends that he's really super close with, and I have like my entire graduating class from Tree Hill. Plus one super badass redhead model who was too cool for the whole graduation thing.

29. Who has more siblings?
Neither of us have any. Though the guys are like his brothers, and Peyton's like my sister.

30. Who wears the pants in the relationship?
Him. I prefer tailored skirts.

31. Who’s more sexy?
He is very, very sexy.

32. Who sleeps naked?
We both do. ;)

33. Who has the craziest ex?
Probably me. Can anyone else say 'Felix'? Okay, please don't.

34. Who has more money?
He does. I mean, I have a multi million dollar company, but he's from old money.

35. Who has more tattoos?
Me. I just have the one.

36. Who eats more sweets?
Definitely me.

37. Who is closer to their family?
He is. Total mama's boy. It's good though. There is that whole thing about how a man treats his mom reflects how he'll treat you. If that's the case? Then I am queen.

38. Who has the older car?
Him. I just bought a brand new one, but he still has his hot convertible.

39. Who has bigger dreams?
Me, probably. Don't get me wrong, Harvard is such a big deal. But the whole clothing line thing? Even I didn't believe it was really possible.

40. Who cries more?
Me. Hello, someone please take my copy of The Notebook away ASAP.

theatrical_muse #222 - Sleeping on the couch.

Fri, 28 Mar 2008 06:06:17 GMT

The best part of any day lately has been coming home and seeing Rachel. Usually she’s curled up on the couch, but occasionally I’ll find her out on the deck, or in the kitchen. But she’s there, you know? At least she was. And that’s all that mattered. ‘Cause I think about what might have happened if I hadn’t found her at my place in the City that day. She was as good as dead. She ODed. And if no one had been there, if I didn’t…God, she could just be dead. I’d never forgive myself if something happened to her. It was my fault she went as far down as she did. What kind of person fires their own friend? Especially one who has done as much for me as she has? There weren’t really any other people lining up to take a bullet for me back in high school. Mostly, there were just these people aiming them at me.

I know that some people question me bringing her home with me. I know, she should be in rehab, and I can’t help her the way that they could, and I’m just not qualified for something like that. Maybe not. The thing is, Rachel didn’t wanna go to rehab. She didn’t want to be alone. I thought I owed to her to keep that from happening. I thought that maybe, just maybe, I could return her the favor of being saved. Just like she saved me.

But I guess maybe everyone who questioned my decision was right. Even Victoria. ‘Cause there’s a big difference between taking the fall for someone who cheated on a Calculus test and taking the fall for someone who almost killed themselves because they’re addicted to drugs. Worst case scenario, I might have had to repeat my Senior year. Worst case scenario for her? She might have died.

Now she’s gone, along with the full cash return on my investment in Peyton’s record label. I know, stupid. I should have never left all that cash right there. Not when I knew how down she was and how close to falling off that proverbial wagon. I’m a terrible friend. It’s true. There’s really no denying it now. I will never, ever forgive myself if she doesn’t come back, safe and in one piece. And it’s not even about the money. I’d give ten times the amount she took just to come home and see her sleeping on my couch again.

Brooke Davis
One Tree Hill
414 Words

Random questions thingie from goaskmalice

Sat, 15 Mar 2008 07:27:47 GMT

1. Has anyone ever told you you have pretty eyes?
Yes. Lots of people.

2. What kind of computer do you have?
Some really ridiculously expensive laptop that Victoria picked out for me to do business stuff on, even though she never lets me do business stuff.

3. What have you learned today?
My boyfriend and my best friend are both such prudes.

4. How many different people of the opposite sex have you cried over?
Way too many to count.

5. Do You Like to Smile?
Of course. Unless you give me something to not smile about. Then I've got a few patented mean type looks I enjoy equally.

6. How Tall Are You?
5'6&1/2"

7. What Do You Want to Be When You Grow Up?
Me. I'm exactly who I wanted to be when I grew up.

8. What Time Do You Usually Wake Up On the Weekends?
It depends on what events or business type things I've got going on. As much as I love to sleep until noon if not later, sometimes that is just totally impossible.

9. Do You Like Peanut Butter?
Faith totally nailed this one. Who doesn't like peanut butter?

10. What was your favorite class in high school?
Definitely not Calculus.

11. How much did you weigh when you were born?
6 lbs 4 oz. I was a tiny little thing. But my lungs were huge.

12. What brand of body lotion do you use?
Right now? Bath & Body Works' Enchanted Orchid.

13. Should country music die?
Definitely. Well, except for like The Wreckers. They did this whole country vibe, and it actually worked for them.

14. If you could live in any other country, which one would you pick?
Italy. Fashion week in Milan was like, the epitome of everything I've ever dreamed of.

15. Where were you when you heard about the World Trade Towers?
High school. It was freshman year and I was sitting next to Peyton in homeroom.

16. Are camera phones worth it?
Unless you're the one getting snapped in scandalous situations, then yeah. Totally.

17. Are there too many commercials on tv?
I don't really watch enough t.v. to know. Plus, the advertisements for Clothes Over Bros is mostly billboards and print ads.

18. How many times have you moved?
Quite a few. From Tree Hill to L.A. to New York and then back to Tree Hill, with possibly another move to somewhere much, much more north eventually.

19. What color are your bed sheets?
This muted lilac color that's almost pink yet almost grey.

20. What would you look for in choosing a roommate?
Already found it all. Peyton is the perfect roommate.

21. Do you ever keep arguing even when you know you’re wrong?
Only most of the time.

22. What are the 5 top traits you look for in a male/female?
1. He's hot. I know, this makes me vain or whatever, but let's face it, we're all human and looks matter more than anyone's willing to admit while trying to save face.

23. Do long distance relationships work?
I'm hoping they do... So far ours is great. It's amazing, really.

24. Scuba-diving or Sky-diving?
Neither?

25. Is there anyone you'd die for?
There is more than just one. My best friend, my boyfriend, my godson, his parents, Lucas. Gladly I would for any of them.

26. Spell your name without an E,R,S,H,K,I,M,A:
Boo - haha!

27. What are you listening to?
"Break The Ice" by Britney Spears on repeat. I kinda wanna go out to a club somewhere and just tear up the dancefloor with this. It's such a hot song.

28. Is any part of your body sore?
My heart is sore after my last talk with Victoria

29. Are you happy with your life right now?
I'm trying to be. There's not a lot about it that I would change because I somehow got it all. But the things that I would change, just these...these little things I would change, they somehow seem harder than it all.

30. Are you missing anyone?
Definitely. Caleb's not flying down until tomorrow evening for the big St. Patrick's Day party at Tric and then he was to leave first thing Tuesday morning.

31. How do you earn money?
Multi-million dollar clothing brand plus magazine mean anything to you?

32. Are you outgoing?
I think anyone who's ever met me would say so.

33. Where do you wish you were right now?
In Cambridge.

34. Are you slowly drifting away from someone close?
I don't think so. If anything, I think we're all finding each other again.

35. When was the last time you felt unbearably guilty?
When I found Rachel half dead after an OD and later realized it was my fault because I let Victoria pressure me into firing her and then I just...I dropped the ball with her and wasn't a very good friend when she needed me more than ever.

36. How is life going for you right now?
Can't really complain. Still just as bumpy as ever, but at least it all seems to have gone my way in almost every way that counts.

37. When was the last time you held someone’s hand?
Rachel's, when I walked her down to the car I'd arranged to take us both back to Tree Hill.

38. Who can you tell everything to?
Peyton, without filter. I also tell a lot to Haley, and even Caleb though we're still sort of figuring everything out. And if I needed to, I know I could go to Lucas or Nathan, or even Mouth or Skills for that matter. I've gotta lot of people who've got my back.

39. Who was the last person you talked to on AIM?
Haley

40. Last words you spoke?
"I love you too. Bye."

41. Did you date someone you regret dating?
The name Felix comes to mind. As well as a few other jerks.

42. What is your natural hair color?
Brunette

43. What is the next concert you're going to?
I think Peyton and I are gonna spring for a little road trip to see Mia perform, sometime after Lucas and Lindsey's wedding this week.

44. Can you play guitar hero?
Oh, I can rock guitar hero. But for some reason? Only when drunk.

45. Do you like someone?
I like a lot of people. I even love some of them.

46. Do you prefer warm or cold weather?
Definitely warm. But after my first New England winter when we spent Christmas with Caleb's mother, I know I can at least survive the cold.

47. Who is your last text from?
Faith. We were setting up a little girl's night out with me, her, and Peyton.

50. What was the last movie you saw in theaters?
27 Dresses. For research purposes only. I think P. Sawyer, Haley, and I are supposed to go see that Boleyn Girl one with Scarlett Johansson and Natalie Portman though.

49. Who did you last share a bed with?
Sexually? My boyfriend. Non-sexually? Peyton crawls in with me every now and then.

50. Coach Purse or NFL game tickets?
Coach Purse, but only if I can trade up for a Prada.

51. Do fish have feelings?
Probably. They seem to flop around a lot and their gills go crazy when they get stuck out of water. Seems painful to me.

52. What do you currently smell like?
Very Sexy perfume by Victoria's Secret.

53. How old do you think you will be when you finally have kids?
Hopefully still pretty young. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't already thinking about it.

54. Would you rather watch football or baseball?
Football. Love those tight pants and all that padding. Not to mention their butts.

55. What's the strangest fact about you?
I'm almost 22 years old and I still let my mother boss me around and run the company I created. And it's not even because I'm afraid of her. It's because in some way that I know is sick, I still want her to love me and to be part of my life. Even if it's just the part that drags me down.

56. Where is your number one person on your friends list?
What the Hell? This isn't MySpace. There's no numbering.

57. Do you feel like dancing?
Absolutely.

58. How much money do you have on you?
You mean in cash? Or adding up the spending limits on all my plastic? Suffice to say, enough.

59. Do you sleep naked?
Sometimes.

60. Is there someone on your mind that shouldn't be?
Maybe. I know that, supposedly, Rachel shouldn't be on my mind right now. Not after what she did, especially after I tried to help her. But I cannot stop thinking about her, and it doesn't seem wrong to me. She's still my friend. She still deserves my help. I just don't know where to find her now and I've realized my help just isn't enough.

61. Do you burn easily in the sun?
Nope. I actually tan well.

62. Do you speak another language other than English?
Maybe some Italian or some French or both, just to make all those Fashion Weeks that much easier to follow along with.

63. What made you happy today?
An e-mail Caleb sent me, having lunch with my best friend, and texting our new friend Faith to set up some party plans.

64. What's your ringtone?
Break The Ice by Britney Spears. I don't care how much of a hot tranny mess she is, I still love her.

thetenspot 036. TEN places I’ve had sex with Caleb Danvers and why.

Sat, 15 Mar 2008 02:32:42 GMT

1. My loft in New York City – because we were there.
2. His dorm room at Harvard – see above.
3. LaGuardia airport – because he was leaving.
4. The new house in Tree Hill – my new bedroom needing breaking in.
5. Peyton’s office at Tric – the bathroom was taken?
6. The Four Seasons – Rachel was crashing at my loft.
7. Backseat of his Mustang – because I had to greet him the old school way.
8. The Luxor – we were in Vegas for Valentine’s Day.
9. Clothes Over Bros’ boutique in Tree Hill – because it was hot.
10. His parents’ house in Ipswich – see #1.

Brooke Davis
One Tree Hill

The best way to live is by not knowing what will happen to you at the end of the day... -Donald Bart

Fri, 14 Mar 2008 06:35:05 GMT

"Uh, Millicent?" I called out from behind the counter as I sat on my knees in a skirt that was really too short for kneeling on the floor. "Have you seen my Day Planner?" I asked. I couldn't find the damn thing, and the truth was? It was very vital to my sanity. More so even than my BlackBerry. I wasn't much for digital schedules. I needed every thing spelled out for me, on paper, where I could see it more easily.

"I think I saw Victoria carrying it." Millicent admitted quietly, probably already aware of what kind of reaction that was bound to get from me.

"Oh, isn't that fabulous." I said dryly, whimpering in frustration when I forgot to pay attention and smacked my head on some sort of shelving apparatus used for storing shopping bags as I was leaning back up to pull myself to my feet. "What does she need with it anyway?" I whined, picking up my latte and taking a sip of it.

My assistant frowned a little bit, like she wasn't sure if she should even go there. I just simply raised an perfectly sculpted eyebrow in her direction, letting her know that she'd better go there. She sighed. "Victoria said that you didn't have the attention span to manage a Day Planner that covered more than just an actual day." It was my turn to frown.

"You know what? I am getting so sick of what Victoria thinks. This isn't even her company!" I added, slamming my nearly empty cup down on the counter beside the register hard enough to split the plastic seams of the lid. It was true though. My mother was ruining my life just because she didn't trust me not to ruin my company. And no one was immune from her wrath. Especially Peyton. That was what was making it even harder to deal with. She didn't just stick to the company. She was trying to run my personal life too.

"I'll go see if I can find her," Millicent offered, though honestly, she probably wanted to deal with Victoria less than even I did at that point. Which was really saying something, considering I wanted to put my own mother on the first plane back to New York and then call in a fake tip to the airline and have her placed on that No Fly list thingie.

"Do that." I said, feeling myself losing patience by the second, but knowing that my assistant didn't deserve the potential fall out that was coming. I watched her disappear out the glass doors of the boutique before heading back behind the counter and placing my hand to my forehead. She was really going to make me fire her one of these days, wasn't she? My mother, not Millicent. Every day, it was the same thing with her. Any way she could find to undermine my authority or to make me feel incompetent, she'd do it in a heartbeat and then spend the rest of the day trying to convince me of how it was for my own good. The days were falling in to a sort of predictable routine where the only thing that surprised me any more was my own tolerance level.

That and...

"Cordelia?" I said, glancing up as I noticed the customer who'd just entered also happened to be my long last half sister I'd just found out about last year. With everything in New York, I hadn't seen her yet since I'd been back in time to open the Clothes Over Bros branch here in L.A. We'd kept in touch, mostly through e-mail and the occasional phone call, but I definitely wasn't expecting her to show up here today. Moving back out from behind the counter once more, I moved over to give her a small, tentative hug before pulling away.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, attempting to contain the little rush of excitement I got from seeing her again. Don't get me wrong, I'd always really wanted to be an only child, so finding out I had an older sibling wasn't exactly the most joyous occasion of my life. But as far as older sisters went, she was definitely someone I could have seen myself following around and trying to emulate so really, it just made sense. And anyway, it could've been worse. The first person Peyton met who was supposedly her long lost sibling turned out to be a psychopath.

Cordelia...

theatrical_muse 219 - Headlines

Sun, 02 Mar 2008 04:26:48 GMT

So, here's the thing about being famous: people think they know you. It's easy to see why they'd think that. You suddenly become this person of public interest and then the next thing you know, someone's stealing your trash so they can post your grocery store receipt on the Internet for all to see and dissect you accordingly. Like anyone can tell anything about you from your diet of sparkling water and chicken salads with the occasional cheesecake.

And like they can tell anything more from looking at pictures of you that some ruthless paparazzi with a complete lack of morals snapped of you and some guy, claiming you to be a couple. When the truth is, you don't even know the guy, you can barely remember his name because your agent or publicist or whoever arranged the whole thing. It's good publicity for him, it's good publicity for you, but like everything else in this business that's fake, it's much ado about nothing. 'Cause you're not even interested in the actor, the basketball player, the musician who writes tortured love songs that everyone speculates or just blatantly assumes were written about you because they once saw a picture of the two of you attending some black tie event or having coffee on the sidewalk outside some little cafe.

They don't know about the one that you don't want them to know about. And the truth is? He's the only one that matters. And that's why no one will ever know about him. Because a lack of privacy kills relationships. Plus there's this thing where you've found something amazing and you kinda just want to keep it all to yourself and not share. Especially with the entire world.

The truth is, no one knows you. Not your friends, 'cause you have to pretty much bail on them at every turn to keep working your ass off to reach just a little bit higher. Not your family, because the only thing they want is a piece of you. Whichever piece they can get. And definitely not any of your entourage, who basically get paid to tell you 'yes' even when they should be telling you 'no'.

It's lonely, and definitely sad that you find yourself thinking that if it weren't for all those fake, orchestrated headlines? It's like no one would know you existed at all. It just may be that no one will ever know the real you, or the you that you've become. But at least it's better than no one knowing you at all.

Brooke Davis
One Tree Hill
424 Words

thetenspot 075. TEN things you should talk to a therapist about.

Tue, 05 Feb 2008 02:00:42 GMT

1.My mom is totally ruining my life and taking over my career.
2.My best friend and I slept with two of the same guys.
3.One of those guys is now married and has a kid with our other best friend.
4.We're now sleeping with each other.
5.I still have nightmares sometimes about Psycho!Derek, the school shooting, and Chris Keller.
6.I slept with Chris Keller.
7.I kissed Pete Wentz from Fall Out Boy once.
8.No, I'm not making #7 up.
9.I once had a job where I had to wear a crab suit. Talk about horrific.
10.The fact that I had a sex tape even before Paris Hilton did.

Brooke Davis
One Tree Hill

theatrical_muse #215 - Seduction

Fri, 01 Feb 2008 09:02:13 GMT

In high school, I was the seductress. Everyone knew it. I was the party girl with the habit of changing from my cheerleading uniform into regular clothes in the backseats of basketball players' car. The one you could always count on to be drunk by the time you arrived, and in whatever upstairs bedroom with whoever long before you left.

It was so easy then. I was bored, lonely, attention-starved, and shameless. My parents didn't care what I wore, so I think at one point, I was wearing things just to see if they'd notice. They didn't, but every boy at Tree Hill High sure did. I guess that was good enough. Back then, at least.

Then, I met Lucas Scott. And I fell in love. And well, you know how that goes. You get all serious and sweet and seduction becomes this whole other thing. Like you don't have to try so hard. The person you're with, they already want you. So you don't have to work for it. You can just enjoy the experience. Like really put yourself into it. Plus it's easier because after awhile, you just know what works. No getting turned down like that one time I tried to get Jake to sleep with me at Nathan's party.

I missed that, when I was out there in the world, trying to become someone. I didn't really date so much as I made appearances with attractive, successful men that helped raise or keep my profile up. It was all so empty, and sometimes I don't think I'd even remember the first thing about turning someone on. Obviously I would, it just feels like I've been out of the game for so long.

Either way, I don't wanna go back to the way I used to do things. Too fast, too much, with all of that never really being enough. I want another fairytale romance. Where greeting him at the door in a pair of heels and not much else or sending him naughty text messages is a surprise. Instead of an expectation of some clueless boy who couldn't catch a signal if you gave him four full bars of service.

Brooke Davis
One Tree Hill
360 Words

RP for wear_ahalo ((TTS verse))

Thu, 31 Jan 2008 06:50:02 GMT

Brooke was still in love with her new house. It was big and spacious and every inch of it was just beautiful. There were a few things that could use her decorative touch, but overall, it was beyond nice. And right on the water, with that little wooden deck with it's little wooden beach chairs, and oh. There was just so much about it she was crazy for. And it was hers. All hers. And, well, Peyton's too. It belonged to her best friend and kind of love interest (maybe? possibly? ~~totally...~~) too, since she lived there, and had her own room and everything.

But the return to Tree Hill had been less restful leaving little room for all the excitement she was feeling. First, there was Victoria on the warpath and trying every second to either convince or coerce Brooke into returning to New York which just wasn't happening. Then there was the stuff with Peyton who was unemployed after leaving her job in Los Angeles to come home. The record label was shaping up, and Brooke had every confidence that Peyton was going to do amazing things with it, and with her investment. But it was still going to take time. Just like Nathan's recovery, which kept him pretty busy along with her other best friend, Haley who had to juggle son, crippled husband, and new teaching job. Brooke envied their little family, and what they had. But she so did not envy the responsibilities that came along with it.

Luckily for her though, she had managed to score a lunch date with the ever elusive Haley James Scott, which was equally a chance to catch up as well as show off her new place. She was so excited for Haley to see it. They had both moved up so much in the world from the days they'd been living with other people and then sharing that little apartment. Coming from her office at the failed Clothes Over Bros store in Tree Hill, she met Haley as they were both coming up the walk. Squeeing just a bit, she ran up to her, heels clacking away on the concrete as she consumed her with a hug before slipping her arm through Haley's, effectively linking them by the elbow.

“So, Teacher Girl, do I ever have the best lunch date planned.” She said excitedly as they made their way up to her front door. “First, a full service tour of Casa de Brooke and Peyton. Then? Catered lunch from that really fabulous seafood place just down the shore from us. After that? I'm thinking you need to be introduced to Peyton and I's newest ritual, which includes a glass of wine and a great view.” Brooke almost squeed again in excitement, but she refrained so she could keep from overwhelming her overworked friend. “How's that sound?” She asked, smiling hard as she pushed open her front door, letting Haley into her new home.

FM February Topic - Write a letter to one or both of your parents.

Wed, 30 Jan 2008 18:09:44 GMT

Victoria,

First of all, let me just say that I have hated calling you that ever since the day you told me to. 'Cause being called 'mom' made you supposedly sound 'too old'. Well guess what? You are my mom. You gave birth to me, there's no getting away from that. Though I guess you tried as hard as you could to while I was growing up, huh?

You weren't there for me. You didn't come to the state championship games I cheered in, to the cheerleading competitions, even to my graduation. Hell, you couldn't even be bothered to come pick me up the day Jimmy Edwards brought a gun to school and my best friend got shot and they'd only let us leave with a parent. Lucas's mom had to sign me out. Why? Again, because you weren't there.

After awhile, it stopped hurting. Which is kind of a lie, but not really. I guess the truth is that after awhile, I just stopped expecting you to show up. And when I stopped expecting it, it made it easier not to care when you let me down.

So it's funny that you started showing up when I started becoming successful. You never fooled me. I knew that you and dad were really separating and you needed somewhere else to go. Someone else to live off of since money is all that really ever mattered to you. Money, and lifestyle, and reputation. God, you really were the kind of person who was born to build a brand, weren't you? The thing is, you weren't the only person nursing a broken heart when you wanted to make Clothes Over Bros more than just a clothing line. I let you do all of that because through the help of a friend, I realized I needed something to focus on. Something that would consume me to the point, I wouldn't even think about this thing that had surfaced again at all.

From then on, I let you run my company. I let you make Clothes Over Bros what it is. A powerhouse. A franchise. With high end couture, and a magazine, all these things I probably would have never thought of, let alone pursued. And or everything you did? I am so grateful. I know my line wouldn't be what it is today without.

But that's the thing, Victoria. It's still my company. Just because I made you CEO, doesn't mean you actually own it. And you know what else you don't own? Me. You don't even let me call you 'mom', so don't even try to act like you really think of me as your daughter. 'Cause I know you don't.

I just wanted you to know, there's going to be some changes from now on. And you probably won't like them. In fact, I know you won't. You don't like any idea, unless it's yours. I know I may not be the brains behind the operation, so you think I'm just going to fail if I do this on my own or if I deviate from the carefully constructed business plan you've made. But you know what I am, Mom? I'm the heart. I don't know if you've still got one of those, or if you ever even had one, but I do know that mine's in the right place right now and I don't want to lose it out there somewhere so that I can be just like you.

Everything I've ever done is so that I'll never be anything like you. That's the only good influence you've ever had on me.

Love regardless,
Brooke

thetenspot 073. TEN songs on your shuffle right now.

Wed, 30 Jan 2008 16:32:22 GMT

1. “The Way I Are” by Timbaland
2. “Stop & Stare” by One Republic
3. “Makes Me Wonder” by Maroon 5
4. “Piece of Me” by Britney Spears
5. “Paralyzer” by Finger Eleven
6. “AYO Technology” by 50 Cent feat. Justin Timberlake
7. “Wannabe” by The Spice Girls
8. “Over My Head” by The Fray
9. “Save Me From Myself” by Christina Aguilera
10. “Mixtape” by Butch Walker

thetenspot January - 10 Things In My Bedroom

Sun, 27 Jan 2008 03:14:52 GMT

1. Queen-sized bed
2. Art that I had my assistant, Millicent, order
3. Oversized coffee mugs on the Ethan Allen bedside tables from business teleconferences in bed
4. A pretty amazing stereo set up with capabilities for playing a certain person's massive vinyl collection
5. Sketchbooks full of potential Clothes Over Bros designs
6. An empty wine bottle or two. They have a tendency of rolling under the bed
7. T.v., Tivo, surround sound, etc. all of which never get used because I never have time
8. Curtains I made myself, same with all of the bedding. I think Tommy Hilfiger got a little threatened when he heard, I guess thinking I might actually make a whole separate line for it
9. A laptop, PDA, extra batteries for both as well as for my cellphone
10. Peyton

Brooke Davis
One Tree Hill

thetenspot 057. TEN things you always hoped of yourself and achieved.

Wed, 16 Jan 2008 09:36:09 GMT

1. My fashion line. It is the epitome of everything I've ever wanted to do with my life, and it's actually mine. I don't know. I don't think I was ever supposed to be this lucky. But I am.
2. Being a godmother. Okay, so I'd never really had this deep desire to be someone's mother or godmother or whatever. I'd actually never really thought about it at all. But, I'd always hoped that one day, I'd be the kind of person who was worthy of that sort of thing. And I guess I was. Am. Since you know, it's still all present tense.
3. To get over the fact that my parents are who they are. They're distant, and they're absent, and my mom really is still a total bitch. For so long, it hurt me so much that they didn't seem to want to be a part of my life. Now, I'm kinda wishing they would disappear. But regardless? I'm over it. And that's all that matters.
4. You know, I always wanted to get past my cliche, high school party girl thing. It's fun for awhile, but pretty soon it starts to suck to be known as the drunk, promiscuous girl. I wanted to be known for way more than that. For good things. And I got my wish. I'm like Tree Hill's hometown girl who went away to New York and made good. Even though I was already making good back in high school.
5. To use any power or influence I might obtain to be a positive influence and to change things for the better. Like the anorexic models they try to put on the cover of my magazine and always get a hasty veto from me. To moving back to Tree Hill when my best friend needed me, and being able to invest in her label so she could even have one. I never wanted to be rich or famous just to be. I wanted to be able to do things with whatever good fortune life happened to bring me.
6. I always wanted to get myself to a healthy place emotionally and romantically. Like in high school, I slept around for awhile. Then I get entangled in that whole messy love triangle with Lucas and P. Sawyer that went on practically forever. In between, I dated asses like Felix Taggaro, and the antithesis of all the guys I've dated before, Chase Adams. But you know, save for Lucas, my heart was never really in the right place in any of that. I was one of those girls. The ones who couldn't stand to be alone. Now Lucas, Peyton, and I are all really great friends. And I don't date losers anymore. In fact, I don't date anyone just yet. There's some interest in a certain person. But the point is, I can stand on my own two feet. I've been standing on my own two feet. And I've been fine.
7. Another thing I always hoped for was that once I got handed the whole godmother gig, I'd be able to do right by it. And so far? Jamie seems to think I do. He told me that he's so glad that I'm his godmother. Which means I've gotta be doing something right.
8. Let's face it, I'd been dreaming about going to red carpet events since I was like 4. And now, I've been to like a hundred of them. It's always just as magical and surreal as it was the first time, just, less terrifying.
9. One day, I always hoped I'd stand up to my mom. And I did. I let her get away with so much. With never being around, and then being a bitch whenever she actually was there. I even let her take control of the company that I'd built, without her support or encouragement or even any help from her. It was a mistake, to make her CEO. To give her more power over my life than she'd ever deserved. But I fixed it. It's my company, and I'll be damned if anyone but me calls the shots for it, or my life.
10. No matter how far I went, or what I became in life, and as much as I'd always wanted to get the Hell out of Tree Hill, I secretly hoped that when I made or broke myself out there, I'd come home eventually. There really is no place like it. And while I'd like to hang on to these ruby slippers as long as it's age appropriate to wear them (it's a metaphor, really. for my Loboutains.), it's also so good to be back. They say you can't go back. Whoever 'they' are, they'd clearly never met me before.

Brooke Davis
One Tree Hill

EM January Topic - Role Model

Wed, 16 Jan 2008 07:09:22 GMT

So, I had this whole thing planned out of writing about Sarah Jessica Parker. I mean, first of all? The woman is a fashion icon. Even if you don't want to be a designer, you have to appreciate the way she mixes and matches and at least want to dress like her. She pretty much defines the term fashionista. Plus, her and I have similar philosophies when it comes to the whole sizing issue. I'm not a big fan of Steve & Barry's, but I've been there a couple of times to check our her line, Bitten, and that one Amanda Bynes has. These are things I kind of need. You know, points of reference. I mean, they are affordably priced celebrity lines and mine is more of a high end, moderately priced line that gave me my celebrity and not the other way. Anyway, the point is, whether you're a size 2 or a size 20, you can find something really stylish and adorable, not to mention completely affordable in her line. I really admire that.

But then, I came back to Tree Hill and met my godson again. The last time I saw him, he was pretty much just born. Haley gave birth to James literally the night we graduated. And not long after that, P. Sawyer and I were on a plane to L.A. Neither of us really ever looked back. We kept in touch...a little. But I wouldn't call myself nearly as much a part of his life as I should have been.

The thing is, this kid is cute. Like, he is really cute. And I'm not just saying that because I've got some kind of bias. (Even though I do, obviously.) He is adorable and a little heartbreaker already. And he's smart too, you know? Which makes sense, 'cause Haley's smart. But still, he's just a kid and I think he's already surpassed the highest IQ some of the people we went to high school with had.

And he's brave. He's had so much to deal with in his short life already, with Nathan and the accident and just all the trauma they've all been through. Having Dan Scott for a grandfather would screw anyone up for life, but he is remarkably well adjusted. And did I mention smart? And so totally adorable? I did, didn't I? Oh well. It's true!

Even though it just recently happened, I'll probably never forget the soapbox derby. The kid just wasn't feeling it, and I told him, sometimes you've just gotta take a stand. And he did. That's where the brave part comes in. In a lot of ways, it really inspired me. Made me take my own stand. One that was so necessary and so completely overdue.

I know he's only four, and I'm his godmother which means I'm supposed to be his role model. But really? Jamie is totally my hero. People always said that I was going to change the world, but my godson? He's so going to rule it one day.

FM January Topic - Grudge {{Thanks for the memories, even though they weren't that great...}}

Wed, 16 Jan 2008 06:18:30 GMT

I'm all about letting things go. Didn't always used to be. But a lot of things change over the course of high school. You learn so many things, and you get older. I mean the difference between 14 and 18 is practically staggering. And that's just four years. Four short, really long years. So you learn to get over things, and to bury your hatchets eventually because you start losing people. Time fades memory a little bit. Most of the time, it softens the edges of things, and you only remember what was good.

Or, if the person's still alive and you're not tripping all over a guilt complex of speaking ill of the dead, it's a lot easier to just focus on all the bad and only remember that. I think it wastes more time and energy than anything else, not to mention only hurts more to carry that with you. I think that's why a lot of people eventually grow up. They get tired of holding all that weight.

But not always. I've forgiven so many people, you know. Peyton, Lucas, Rachel, even my parents. (It was more like I had to just accept them for what they are, which was never really parents to begin with.) And I've been happy to do it. Really. It's not like I ever wanted to carry that around with me anyway. But there are just some things, some people I can't seem to forgive. Somethings I just can't really forget.

For example, Felix. Like there are so many good things he did for me. He paid for my broken windshield, even when he wasn't responsible for it. And he helped me, with all those labor laws when my parents went broke and I had to take up that awful job. You know most of the time, he was so good to me. I wish I could just remember those things, you know? Wish I could just...not hate him.

But I do. 'Cause all I can think about when it comes to Felix Taggaro is what he did to my best friend. The pain and the humiliation he caused her. How much he tried to hurt her. And how much it ended up hurting me. It was like all the good things just went out the window they replaced on my car. Like they'd never really been that good or mattered that much because what he did was so bad. And I hate him even more for that. For taking away even my good memories of him. For just erasing every good thing I could say about him now.

Time is supposed to make things easier. It's supposed to blur them more and make them hurt less. But even if I lived a million years, I could never really forgive him to the point I could ever look at him as anything other than bad character judgment on my part and a huge mistake in general. He'll never be more or less than the person who wrote 'DYKE' on my best friend's locker. He could have been everything to me. Instead, he's nothing. He's like less than nothing.

It's almost like he never existed at all.

theatrical_muse 211 - Old acquaintance

Sat, 05 Jan 2008 09:10:36 GMT

What the Hell ever happened to Dim?

I was thinking about it the other day. Not that I like, think about him or anything because I seriously don't. The whole time capsule thing came up when someone heard I was from Tree Hill and they remembered hearing about the shooting. So I was explaining how our videos had all gotten leaked and then streamed over the school's closed circuit television system and then later the internet.

Of course, the first thing that comes to mind when I think about that whole experience was how everyone at my high school got to see my boobs. What? I was trying to do something nice. Preserve one of Tree Hill High's best assets for posterity. You know what I mean. Anyway, the second thing I remember most about that video is how Tim Smith (better known as Dim) was talking about how he was my boyfriend! In his dreams. The ones that aren't about Nathan, that is.

Maybe I should feel bad for him. He always was kind of slow. And he was the only boy who didn't get picked in my fantasy boy draft, which had to suck. But he was so annoying. He was always in everyone's way, with his porn and his insecurities.

And then he was just gone when it came time for our Senior year. Word is he went to another school. No one's really heard of him since then. But if I ever find out he's told anyone else he's my boyfriend, I'll probably kill him. Because really, that never happened and never was going to happen. Wherever he is, I'm sure he still dreams of Nathan though.

Brooke Davis
One Tree Hill
279 Words

FM December Topic - Candle

Mon, 17 Dec 2007 05:38:23 GMT

This was it. Peyton and I had finally found some decent digs of our own that didn't include being under my parent's roof. My parents didn't exactly care that much, at least I didn't think they would if they actually paid enough attention to know what was going on, but it was still nice to be out on our own. I'd found the perfect condo in this high rise, right on the beach. It was one of those corner ones, with the little wrap around balcony, up on the tenth floor. So from one view, we had the water, and all we had to do was round the corner to see the lights of Los Angeles spreading out as far up the coast as we could see. It was amazing.

And, thanks to my impeccable taste, credit card with a practically infinite limit, and new penchant for all things Pottery Barn and Pier 1 Imports, the place looked all swanky and just about as amazing and glamorous as the city that lay beneath it. P. Sawyer and I had had a few arguments. Differences of opinions, if you will. She had her own taste, but we weren't exactly painting her high school bedroom for the billionth time. This was our own apartment! It was supposed to be posh, and grown up. I mean, I had dinner parties planned and booked well into next year. I loved her, I really, really did. But we couldn't really entertain people, from the fashion or music industries, or even our friends with her emo murals of death angels and love triangles.

Speaking of love triangles, they were over. They were all over. I think Lucas and Nathan both kinda hated us, all things considered. But it didn't matter. I mean, I felt bad. But we were happy, and that's all that matters, right? Sounds selfish, but what's the point in living if you're not happy. Or at least actively trying to be. She chose me, I chose her. Why would either of them want to be with either of us anyway? And no, they can't watch.

The place was all set pretty much, the bonus of being able to pay people to move for you and also do the decorating. (Which I severely oversaw.) All that was left for was to wait for our inaugural pizza. Pizza and champagne, it was the perfect first meal for our new place. Champagne to celebrate, and pizza to remind us that no matter how far we've come, we're still from a little place called Tree Hill.

Peyton had answered the door and was setting out the plates while I tried to figure out which champagne would go best with pizza. We had pretty much nothing else in our fridge yet, so there were several kinds to choose from. I had just settled on the Dom Perignon when the light went out. Ugh, already? This thing was supposed to be brand new! But looking up, I noticed all the other lights were out too, and that it was unusually dark for this time of day.

"Peyton?" I said, giving her a curious look and she just shrugged. Um, okay. It's not like we hadn't paid our electric bill or anything. Grabbing one of those long lighters, I began to light every single one of the million candles that I had lined everywhere. I didn't care if they were just for decoration. It was dark in here!

"Uh, Brooke?" Peyton called from the sliding glass doors that led out to our ocean view. "Think you're gonna want to come see this." I raised an eyebrow, but put down the lighter, picking a candle up instead to take with me. "What is it?" I asked, but she didn't even need to answer. A cold blast of air blew out the candle I held in my hand, and the beach beyond our balcony was covered in a layer of snow. And the ocean was... was the ocean seriously frozen solid? No, I swear. Someone was ice skating on the ocean.

"P. Sawyer?" I said, staring in disbelief at our own little beachy winter wonderland. "Hmm?" She replied.

"I don't think we're in North Carolina anymore."

((Open to Peyton))

TM #204 - Sometimes the appropriate response to reality is to go insane. (Philip K. Dick)

Fri, 16 Nov 2007 05:15:27 GMT

It was the so-called most wonderful time of the year. But better than that, it was Brooke Davis's favorite day of the year.

Black Friday.

The biggest shopping day of the year.

It was practically its own holiday. The one time she was actually employed, she had every intention of petitioning that if they had to work, they could at least be given the standard time and a half people were given for working on a holiday. But her job ended up not lasting that long, which worked for her because it's not like time and a half would have her working on the day after Thanksgiving anyway. Unless it was working the aisles of Macy's.

She'd spent the better part of the morning (up since 4 a.m., a Starbucks constantly in hand) checking off each of the sales she'd planned to hit once she'd gotten everything off of her respective lists, and there was just one store left before she could call it a day (at noon) and take a big, fat Black Friday nap. It was just Monopoly. But not just any Monopoly. It was the Juicy Couture special edition with the pink box. She was going to grab one for one for a gift, and one for herself. $58 was pretty steep for a board game, but she reasoned the sale price more than made up for the tendency of anything designer to be overpriced. Besides, the design is what she was paying for. It's not like she'd actually ever played the game before.

Except, she wouldn't be paying for any designer boardgames that day. No, by the time she got to the store, they were all sold out. And it wasn't even new!

It may just be that she repressed the whole thing, or that it was too embarrassing to think about. Whatever the case, she couldn't remember exactly what she'd done to get banned for life from Nordstrom. It might have been the clothing racks she'd knocked over when she'd all but vaulted over a low, three tiered shoe display. Or maybe it was the sales girl who'd been the casualty of someone else's fresh macchiato, which was technically the fault of Brooke's elbow. Quite possibly, it was the nine foot tall, fully lit and decorated Christmas tree that she had sent crashing into all of the perfect clear acrylic set ups of designer perfumes. All in pursuit of the last pink box of Monopoly she had had her eyes glued to from the moment she'd walked in.

Afterward, she couldn't really think of why she'd wanted it that badly. It just seemed like she had to have it because she'd already been up for eight hours, fighting ridiculous crowds, and carrying bags in the crooks of her arms until said arms went numb. It also didn't help that she'd had like nine white chocolate mochas that day, all venti sized. Not that it mattered once she'd walked (or been dragged, by security) empty handed.

All she could remember about that day was how she didn't get the Juicy Couture version of Monopoly she'd only kinda wanted in the first place.

Brooke Davis
One Tree Hill
521 Words

FM November Topic - Kaleidoscope

Sun, 28 Oct 2007 22:21:33 GMT

Her fingers run carefully over the entire length of the new bolt of fabric she's just picked up. It's a beautiful, exotic silk print. A kaleidoscope so bright and brilliant, she almost can't bring herself to cut it or to waste even a single scrap. Immediately, her mind is flooded with different visions of the material made dress and draped across skin. She thinks of the perfect skirt cut to fit Haley's newly changed figure, to perfectly lay on those mommy-shaped curves. She thinks of the way framing it in a simple black silk would make it a perfect contrast against Peyton's porcelain skin. A shirt, she thinks. Something flowy, and off the shoulder maybe that could easily be dressed down with some skinny jeans and her favorite Chucks. Brooke can already see the outfit perfectly on Peyton as she announces some no-name band at Tric. Or maybe a strapless dress for Rachel. Something in the vein of Cavalli.

For Brooke Davis, just a single piece of fabric holds so much promise. It can be made into anything she dreams up, and can work it to fit almost anyone's style. To some, it'd just be a loud print that maybe would only fit one or two fashion genre. But to her, it could be anything with the right vision.

Sure, she may have technically failed Calculus and there wasn't really any chance that anyone would ever call her a genius or anything. That part of her brain seemed missing. But the second she cut into a piece of fabric, an entire outfit already laid out in her mind, it all seems to level out. She's pretty sure she got a part of the brain that way more people are missing.

FM October Topic - Spiteful

Sun, 28 Oct 2007 22:02:36 GMT

Peyton wrote 'WHORE' on my prom dress. And not just with a black magic marker or something that would ruin it so that I couldn't wear it. No, she had to dig deep into her big supply of art stuff and find some kind of really magic marker. Or paint, it might have been paint. Anyway, the point is, I didn't even know that the word 'WHORE' had been written all the way across the middle of my beautiful red silk prom dress until I heard people laughing after I stepped under a blacklight. Then, it was pretty loud and clear.

I should have known it was too good to be true when she just all of a sudden returned it to me, when we hadn't really been able to speak without throwing punches the last few times we'd seen each other. Guess I just assumed she'd had a change of heart. Or, you know, that she actually had one. (I'm totally kidding.)

Anyway, who would've known that something done out of so much spite would actually backfire and mean so much? I'm sure P. Sawyer thought when she was doing that that it would hurt me, or embarrass the Hell out of me. But honestly? I was just so glad she actually still cared enough to try and hurt me. If she had just given the dress back, it might have meant she was really done with me. That she just didn't care anymore.

The fact that she wanted to hurt me meant that it wasn't over yet.

EM November Topic - Letter to younger self

Sun, 28 Oct 2007 21:44:46 GMT

Dear little Brooke,

So, you're probably not going to believe this, but it's me- you, when you're 18. Right now that probably seems like it's forever away. Everything seems that way. But trust me, you'll get there. 16 will come much faster than you're even really ready for, no matter what you think. And hey, you even got a pretty awesome car for your birthday. It's a convertible, and pretty much everything you had ever hoped for. That's actually gonna happen to you a lot. You're going to get a lot of things you'd always wanted. And for awhile, it'll be enough. But eventually, you'll realize you get those things in place of the things your parents are really supposed to give you.

Try not to be too disappointed when that happens. Just because it seems like everyone else in your life seems to have at least one great, super interested parent doesn't mean you somehow screwed up for yours not to be. (Just wait and see how Dan and Deb turn out. You'll feel way sorrier for Nathan than you ever felt for yourself. And you'll appreciate that your parents are at least both sane. And not murderers or attempted murderers.) It's not you. It's them. They're the ones who are doing it all wrong. They're the ones who never seemed to figure the whole parenting thing out. Don't blame yourself for where they fail.

You're a good kid. And eventually, you do some things that maybe weren't the best decisions or that show a pretty severe lack of judgment on your part. But at least know that your heart is always in the right place. You really are a good person, you just don't really have any guidance. So you end up finding your way the hard way. Which sucks at first, I won't lie. But you get to be this better person for it. There's really no one like you. No one grows or evolves half as much as you do (again, except maybe for Nathan) and in retrospect, the whole thing is kind of beautiful. Like a butterfly.

Be good to Peyton. She's your best friend, and someday, you're going to need her just as much as she needed you when you two first met. In fact, you're going to need her a lot. And even though she can and will forgive you for so much, try not to take advantage of that, or give her so much to forgive. And speaking of forgiveness, learn how to forgive her. And Lucas. And your parents. You hold all these grudges and act like one transgression is some lifelong unforgivable sin. Just remember, you'll need to be forgiven too.

Overall, you're going to have an amazing life. And it might seem like, your beauty or your social status, or even you're upcoming career in fashion design are the things that are going to make your mark for you, and keep you in top of the popularity game. And for awhile, they definitely will. It's not a game you ever really lose. But it's your heart. Your heart is gonna rule them all. And it's maybe the only thing besides your talent that won't fade with time. So learn how to use it well.

Love,
The fully realized Brooke